I AM IN A CHRISTMAS QUEST. THE QUEST FOR MY INNER JESUS. THE MARY MAGDALENA WHO NEEDS MORE THAN WASH HIS TEARS, NO ONE LOVES HIM MORE THAN I DO. MY BELOVED... THE ONE AND ONLY... BUT AS THIS IS HIS MOMENT, HIS DAY... I AND AM HIM... I NEED TO FIND ME, HIM, US.
I NEED TO SEARCH MY CHRIST ESSENCE TO FEEL WHY I AM HERE. I KNOW THE WHY BUT I NEED TO FEEL IT AND LIVE IT. ITS NOT LIVING IN A SERVICE TO OTHERS AS I DO EVERY YEAR THAT I ACCOMPLISH THIS QUEST, BUT BY LIVING IT BY MYSELF. INSIDE, AT THE CORE OF IT ALL... THE MEMORIES, THE FEELINGS, THE ESSENCE OF ALL THAT HAPPENED AND STILL DOES, THE LOVE... THE MISSION, THE ESSENCE OF HIM.
I DONT WANT TO FIND MYSELF BY HELPING OTHERS, FIRST BECAUSE I DO NOT NEED IT, I LOVE ME AND TRUST ME MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY, SECOND BECAUSE ONLY IN MOMENTS OF COMPLETE SELF COMMUNICATION ONE CAN LISTEN TO ONE`S TRUE VOICE.
IVE NEVER FOUND MYSELF IN CHRISTMAS... WAS TO BUSY SPREADING THE SPIRIT OF THIS SEASON. . NOW, THIS CHRISTMAS, I HAVE CHOSEN TO BE WITH MYSELF. I CONVINCED FAMILY TO GO ON A TRIP AND HERE I AM ALONE (PHYSICALLY) SO I GIVE THE TIME TO BE WITH MY OWN COMPANY.
HAVING A SICK MOTHER AT FIRST, AND AFTER BY NOT HAVING HER HERE ANYMORE, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED AND NURTURED EVERYONE SO THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS WOULD BE FOREVER PRESENT IN THIS FAMILY BUT NOW ALL I WANT IS TO FEEL IT MYSELF. ALL CHRISTMAS I HAD THE NEED TO SHOW OTHERS THAT DIVINE BIRTH CAN ALWAYS HAPPEN IF WE FEEL IT IN OUR HEARTS, NOW I NEED TO RE-BIRTH MY SELF FROM MY OWN INNER LOVE.
I NEED TO BREATHE IT AND RECEIVE IT IN EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING, EVERY CELL, EVERY ATOM. I NEED TO TO HOLD MYSELF IN PURE LIGHT THIS NOW.
TODAY I HAD A MOMENT OF WEAKNESS WHERE THE FEAR OF LONELINESS CAME BUT THE LOVE PREVAILS ALWAYS AND I REMINDED MYSELF THAT I CHOSEN THIS FOR A REASON. I NEED TO STAND UP AND SEE MY NEEDS, DRY MY TEARS, SMELL THESE DAYS, EAT THE MESSAGES, LAY IN LAZINESS IN THE WARMS OF GOD, LAUGH AT EVERYTHING AS I ALWAYS DO.
I AM GETTING THERE... FINDING ME, HIM, US. AND THIS IS THE GREATEST GIFT ONE CAN OFFER TO THE SELF. LOVE
LYRA LIGHT AUTHOR, TEACHER, MYSTIC, FIVE-D PRODUCTIONS OPERATIONS AND MEDIA DIRECTOR, ANGELIC STAR FLEET DIRECTOR FOR THE SUPREME COUNCIL OF GALACTIC FEDERATION.
Copyright 2015, All rights reserved. (THIS EXCERPT MAY BE SHARED ONLY WITH CREDIT TO THE AUTHOR)https://www.facebook.com/maria.antunes.505523
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